Demon hipster chick

He came back

And god I’m so happy. Every time I think about it I melt. HE IS BACK. He came to me with his sweet heart and he told me that he missed me& regretted everything he did wrong. My heart is bursting with joy

Anonymous asked: Are you going to "The Beatles: The Lost Concert" movie premier in a few weeks?

I had no idea there was one! But I want to now.___.

Thinking about death everyday.
Why can’t god just kill me already.
I have nothing to live for.

Do you remember that night?

That night we kissed & fell asleep together. We would wake up in the middle of the night and you would pull me closer to you just to wake me up so we could kiss more. I remember your hands respectfully yet intimately on my body. Everywhere. I remember we watched lord of the rings that night. Then turned it off. It was complete darkness after that. Except the moon. Remember holding my face looking in to my eyes? Yours were gleaming. I remember falling asleep. It was the most comfortable I have ever been. Because your hand was under my t-tank stroking my tummy and back. I remember waking up the next morning… And you were gone. I panicked a bit then my phone rang. It was a text from you. Saying good morning. You had a densest appointment. Your friend josh and I hung out waiting for you to show up. Laughing and smiling talking about eachother and talking about you. I realized I was making a friend. I realized I was in love with you. Do you remember about how it all went down hill from there? We went camping I was so excited. To lay under the stars with you. To laugh with you. I was ready to make memories with this great, no amazing boy. I was thrilled. Do you remember how I threw your shirt in the freezing cold water? Truth is. I wanted to see your body. Did you ever end up getting it from the creek? We had an awesome moment in that creek. We stood there ankle deep in rushing water starring into each others eyes. Almost thinking the same thing. Playing like we were kids again. Splashing water in eachothers faces. Only stoping to kiss.
Later on that night. I was sitting by the fire. To look up & realize… Everyone was gone. It was just me. Alone. So I stayed. Untill your cousin. Showed up with beer. We drank & sang&laughed. I realized. I was making more friends, there came a point were I became quiet. And that is when my self destruction began. I knew were you were and what you were doing. You were falling in love… Do you remember coming back to the camp to find everyone drunk? Did you even think to look in my eyes and see how badly I was hurting? I was second to you. Do you remember laying on the blanket under the stars when everyone was gone? Kissing and talking. You were with me. But I was so lonely. The next day was fun! It’s like nothing happened. We went to your house,remember? And we got in the shower.. Together. It was odd at first but we soon became comfortable with eachother. We laughed and kissed. I gave you an awesome Mohawk. Then we ran up stairs into your room and made love. It wasn’t sex. It was more than that. It was our last time. My last time to feel you and see you and want you in that way. Remember we went back to camp? We sat there and talked. Smiled like we always did. Then you told me you had to leave & go to a girls house. That’s when I knew. By then, my heart was done. You loved her then. I walked you to your car.. Turned and walked back to the camp where your friends were waiting. As I was walking what seemed to be miles I quietly but strongly sobbed. I was able to straighten myself out by the time I got to the camp. I didn’t want to seem week. I turned into the site grabbed a bottle of mad dog 2020 and chugged it. I closed my eyes as the bitterness entered my mouth and into my throat. My thoughts were”forget it kaylee. Forget the hurt. Forget everything &smile” and I did. My body became numb as the. Very last drop entered my system. We proceeded to drink more and more. We all smoked a bit of weed as well. Yeah. We did. I sat by the stream with ethan and talked about how I knew I was losing you. It tore me apart. We ended up running away from nothing and into the woods. We climbed incredible cliffs . I grabbed a fucking cactus. I remember coming back and seeing you waiting at the camp with food. I wasn’t yours anymore.
I can’t remember much more after that. I’m pretty happy about it though…
Two weeks later.. Don’t you remember giving me that little push I needed?
We sat under a tree. The greens were so fucking..green. You were breaking up with me. I secretly begged you to stay with me. In my head. I knew it was coming.. We stood up, hugged and then I couldn’t hold it in anylonger I cried. The first time I had ever cried in front of you. My heart didn’t break. It was destroyed. I was. All I could think was “you’re never good enough kaylee. HE is the proof!! What more do you need? Give up.” I pulled away from you… We looked into eachothers eyes„ and smiled. Like we always did. I stayed a bit longer. Acting like I was fine. Untill I had to leave. It physically hurt me holding back the tears I NEEDED to cry.so I asked you to take me home. The whole way. I sat in the back looking at the window. Crying. As quietly as I could. When you took me to where my mom was parked. I got in the car smiled and waved as you pulled away and drove off. As soon as you were out of sight I threw my head back and balled. That was it. We were done..
Our history was history.
I was just seeing if you remembered..

Everything is so fragile…

My life is fragile. My mind.my body.
At this moment… I’m fragile…